I woke last week to the lovely aroma called eau du natural gas. I am not talking about the natural gas my boys embrace so freely. I am talking about the natural gas which reduces houses to splinters in seconds. After spending considerable time hoping to wake from the bad dream, I acknowledged that perhaps I was already awake.
Moving stealthily so as not to make a spark, I slowly moved down the hall to check the carbon monoxide monitor. The readout was 000, so I knew we were all still alive.
The problem was that the gas odor was stronger than ever. After thinking about what to eat for breakfast and wondering what was for dinner, I considered waking my children and moving them from the imminent danger of the natural gas. But wait! *sniff* *sniff*
It was coming from outside!!! We were safe!!! So it was just our yard that was going to explode!! Fantastic!!!
I thought about my elderly neighbor all alone in her big house. No, I didn't hear her dog barking. I thought about my lovely neighbors on the other side. No, their dog wasn't barking either. Deciding that they might be dead already, I chose to leave them alone.
*Sniff* *sniff* The gas seemed to be lessening. So ... I left my sleeping children in their beds and drove over to work to pick up some textbooks.
Okay. I know you've just decided not to will your children to me, but everything turned out just fine. Exactly as it should. A little construction incident nearby was the culprit. Just a little illegal venting of gas lines.
How do I know? I know because I have a neighbor with common sense and she called the gas company. And my own children? The children I left behind? What they don't know won't hurt them. At least this time it didn't.
Now, if you will please excuse me, I going back to put my head in the sand for a while. Why don't we wait a little while longer before you send me that Mother of the Year award?