Wednesday, July 2, 2008
My in-laws did a nice job of raising my husband. He is a hard worker, kind, thoughtful, and cute. But somewhere in that household was a gaping hole, and it impacts Checkered to this day. You see, someone, somewhere really messed with Checkered's understanding of pillow use.After we were married and I adjusted to the shock of this horrible blunder in child-rearing, I kind of forgot about it.Then, a year ago, my parents bought me a new memory foam pillow and presented it to me surreptitiously. Why surreptitiously? Well, they hadn't gotten one for Checkered and they didn't want him to feel slighted. I assured them that he would be fine, and then attempted to carry that pillow up the stairs. It didn't budge. I ended up hiring a moving company to get that thing all the way up to our bedroom. I promptly fell in love with that pillow. My pillow and I now have a co-dependent relationship and cannot sleep without each other. If my house were to burn during the night, I would have to take that pillow with me before I looked for my albumless photographic hit-or-miss record of my children's lives. And let me tell you, on the rare occasions that I don't sleep with that pillow, the thing cries all night.Back to the gross neglect of Checkered's pillow training. To this day, my bright, humorous, clever guy thinks his head belongs flat on the mattress with the pillow placed securely over his head. That's right: head on mattress, pillow securely tucked over and around head. I am shaken when I consider the ramifications had my parents given Checkered a 2 ton memory foam pillow. 1. He might have begun to believe that they love him as much as they love me.2. He might have developed a flat head.3. He might have gotten stuck under that pillow ... permanently. And that, readers, is a lesson of some sort.