Tuesday, February 24, 2009

A 12-Step Program to Losing Your Self-Confidence

1. Have a lovely phone interview with another college to teach part-time in their online program.
2. End the interview with the "understanding" that you will be hired provided you pass their training course.
3. Attempt to log-in for several days with your newly-assigned employee password.  Note the "Access denied" message each time.
4. With your newly-fixed password, take the pre-assessment.  If you score a 92% or higher, you will not have to take the course.
5. Score a 72%.
6. Note that the post-assessment will be twice as long as the pre-assessment you just scored 72% on.
7. Reread the directions and confirm that you have only two opportunities to pass the post-assessment.  After that, you're not going to teach at this school.
8. Participate in the first component of the course.  With some panic, take the 5-item self-check at the end of the component.  Be able to answer only one item before panic swallows you whole. 
9. After eating the leftover turkey and a fudge pop, reread the first component.  Take the same 5-item self-check and correctly answer two items.
10. Resort to googling the self-check items.
11. Pass the first component, and feel okay until the first video of the second component assures you that this course is not taught in any language you know.
12. Cry when you realize that there are 9 components left to pass before you can take that ever-so-important post-assessment. Yes, the one you have only two chances to pass.

14 comments:

Laura ~Peach~ said...

this falls into that WHY catergory... because when something causes me so much stress I re evaluate as to why I want to do this, and in the end will it bring me happiness, is it something I have to do to live and if not ... why. Life is way to short to torture one self... teens will suffice OH DEAR! I need coffee or bed or both...back to my corner...

Cairo Typ0 said...

**hugs** One step at a time - we believe in YOU even if you're feeling down on yourself. Now go have another fudge pop, take a deep breath, and feel all teh positive energy being sent your way from the blogosphere. ;)

Living on the Spit said...

That would be enough to make me kick and scream and threathen assault, but then that usually occurs on a daily basis.

Mental P Mama said...

That is just so very wrong.

Sue said...

Yeah, I think I would have lost mine around step 5.

Noe Noe Girl...A Queen of all Trades. said...

yep that will do it!

Julie said...

wow, you sure you want this job? HUGS... YOU CAN DO IT... or have a good time blogging about trying :)

Dr.John said...

All of a sudden I'm glad I'm retired.

Treasia said...

At that point in time I would really be asking myself is the stress worth it. Chances are for me, not. Good Luck...........and remember YOU CAN DO IT.

Betty said...

That´s tough. I would probably ask myself if I really wanted this job. But you´re are not me. YOU CAN DO IT!!

jojo said...

you can do it...I can't..but I have much more faith in you than I do myself. Take a deep breath and inhale another fugde pop...you go baby...

LadiesoftheHouse said...

Sounds like the IRS.

Jeannelle said...

Keep your chin up!

pam said...

And I thought you were joking when you said come help you!

I came earlier to read and catch up and the phone rang. I totally missed this post related to what we were texting about!

Sorry it was such a drag! But I must add, the haircut video cracked me up!