Thursday, November 12, 2009

Dreams to Worry About

My girl and I have been watching "Say Yes to the Dress." She watches it because she has been planning her wedding for the last decade, give or take a year, and she is trying to pick out her dress. While she may be only 14, her taste is 30 and a graduate of medical school. Why settle for a $4,000 dress when there's a similar one for $8,000? I watch the show because it is my duty to frequently remind her that the $4,000 dress fee could really be put toward a down payment on a house. Of course, it could also feed our family of 60,000 6 for 4 or 5 days (if we don't buy any meat.)

My daughter is a little gray on her post-high school plans and she is a little fuzzy on her post-16th birthday employment. She's even a bit hazy on my plan that she will mow the lawn next summer. But say, "Pricilla of Boston" or "Vera Wang" and her eyes light up (they don't really smoke; I was just trying to use a cliche'.)

We sit there, night after night, while she says, "I love that dress," and I reply, "But how long will it take YOU to save that much money? Is it worth it? Maybe we should finally go to Disney World instead?"

She has yet to own up to having a boyfriend (we're okay with no boyfriend) or even a first kiss (we're even better with no kisses) and she is hurt that all the boys notice her friends, but don't seem to notice her so much (that hurt makes me a little sad; Checkered is surprisingly OKAY with it.)

I know there are so many joys, so many heartbreaks, so many dreams still ahead of her. And when those joys, those heartbreaks, and those dreams get a little more real, it will probably be her girlfriends who hear about them first.

So tonight, she and I will be cuddled up on my bed: I'll be annoyed because she ate something crumbly in there, and she'll laugh every single time she realizes that she has again forgotten to fast-forward through the commercials. She will find the perfect $10,000 dress for herself and I'll remind her that her dad has become an expert at sewing on Scout badges. There's no telling what he could whip-up by the time she's grown.



20 comments:

Busy Bee Suz said...

I love that she has lofty dreams of a wedding and not working. Sounds like a good deal to me too. I have a feeling that the boys ARE noticing her, but she is not noticing them noticing her.

PS. I love those weddubg shows too...and lord knows that ship has sailed.

The Incredible Woody said...

I love that you love her enough to let her eat crumbly things in your bed:)

Checkered said...

BTW, I did run my hand under my pillow this morning, only to find a popcorn kernel in my grasp. I grinned and threw it on the floor for later entertainment. A very small price to pay for my ladies to own that special bonding time.

won said...

You're a gentler soul than I.

I had told my daughter she could get married any time after the time I died.

I didn't even want to consider the thought...

My Metabolic Rate is Stuck said...

I want to be around when the time comes! Can't wait to see her dress!
I luv how you have those special bonding moments...oh and think of the prom dresses!! ;)

mom x 2 said...

I love those shows! But I love girl time more. We used to have more of it, but I'll take whatever I can get!

Wonderful World of Weiners said...

But the real question is....what do you think of RANDY??? :)

BTW...been there, done that whole thing with my SIL for her wedding. Kleinfelds really is JUST LIKE THAT IN PERSON!!

Hallie :)

Cairo Typ0 said...

My mother and i used to walk by wedding display windows picking my dress. LOL I love those wedding shows - the brides make me look sane. LOL

Mental P Mama said...

A girl after my own heart.....

That corgi :) said...

so sweet! enjoy these times together! I never heard of that show, now I'll have to check it out

I think all girls love to dream about their weddings, goes with the Disney themed movies "some day my prince will come". Bet over the years her ideas will change so much about what she wants (and even who she wants in a man). I think its good at 14 to be dreaming and planning and enjoying life :)

betty

Nancy Campbell said...

I love the togetherness you describe here the most. Lovely.

It's so difficult to anticipate the future hurts, knowing that they will come because they are part of life, yet wanting to forever be the protective mama bear.

Noe Noe Girl...A Queen of all Trades. said...

**sigh** how sweet!
You're a good mama!
<><

Decadent Housewife said...

What about yours? Such a lovely thing to do together.

Betty said...

I love that you have this bonding time with her! It will be one of your best memories, once she really does have boyfriend and becomes a different person....

A Lawyer Mom's Musings said...

She'll come into her own, don't you worry. And her timing will be perfect. Most important, she's loved.

John said...

Very unique blog.
Fantastic pictures. Wow...

I like your blog.

Please visit:
http://paradise-adventure.blogspot.com

Keep blogging.
Have a great time.

LadyFi said...

Aw... nothing better than cuddling up to the kids in a bed full of crumbs!

Eternal Lizdom said...

I remember my wedding fantasies... and I remember going wild buying up wedding mags and clipping bouquets and dresses and gowns and veils and so on. I didn't go crazy with the price stuff- mine was more dangerous. I was so desperate for my "dream wedding" that I married the completely wrong man. Oops. Wised up, got rid of him, and married the completely RIGHT man in a runaway to Gatlinburg with our closest friends and immediate family way and here we are... with a house and cars and minimal debt! Wahoo!

babybeezymom said...

im seeing my future with this post....Love that show btw, however currently my daughter thinks that she will get married in a castle and look just like Cinderella. I actually had to practice Ariel and prince Eric's kiss with her tonight. I am sure it will backfire on me when she wants to "practice" that kiss at school....great blog...

Mrs4444 said...

Oh-oh. Does Checkered know that it's the scout's job to sew on the badges?? Don't worry-I only made Kyle sew ONE on (after I did the first few because I didn't know any better) and then taught him how to use a glue gun! haha I would SO love to see a wedding dress designed and sewed by Checkered!

I saw the dress of my dreams (Jessica McClintock) in a magazine two years before I even got engaged and cut it out and saved it. When the time came, as luck would have it, I found it on a clearance rack for $190! From what I've heard, prom dresses are a LOT of money. Maybe I'll be able to talk Kendall into white?