But I will. This is the message my phone sent and that I did NOT catch until it was too late. "She used to be a hooker."
Laugh but you know you've been there, too. How do I know that? I've seen your texts and posts on Facebook. So we're even.
But I am pretty sure that my students don't compose their essays on their phones and most don't use tablets. So it was on an old fashioned PC or Mac that they composed these gems which they then submitted for a grade in my composition classes. And grade them, I did. I used to circle the mistakes and draw a smiley face, but then I realized that many of the authors didn't see the mistake even then.
So I will now save them for you. Enjoy the summer session submissions! [I'll even translate them for you.]
"I was sad when I lost my part urinal grandfather. Then I lost several more part urinal uncles." [paternal]
"Me and my dad didn't always have a good relationship. Now we have agreed to a cretin relationship." [certain]
"When my mom broke her arm, she had to have a big sergey on them. That was really painful." [surgery]
"We should stop blaming teachers when kids don't do good in school. I believe one of the biggest problems for kids is having elaterid parents." [illiterate]
And for an alarming statistic :
"Breastfeeding is illegal in 57 U.S. states." [Who knew?]
The new term begins on Monday, and I can't wait.