Thursday, July 3, 2008

DSW: Conflict

I love spring and fall but they bring me tremendous conflict at times. The conflict is not about the allergens bombarding the earth and my family's sinus cavities. It is not about time changes (something I really don't appreciate.) It is not about going back to school or ending the school year. My conflict is about clothing. Well, no it's not. It's really about footwear.

Here's the thing. I am quite sympathetic toward toes. It's not like mine are well-kept or pampered, but I think too many people mistreat their toes. For example, let's say it's the middle of summer. In this region that means we have humidity and temps in the 80's. It's weather that begs the question of confusing clothing. Do I dress for the heat of outside or dress for the arctic air of the central air conditioning?

Do I:

1 - tan and beg for melanoma (but settle for more freckles and melanoma instead)?

2 - use my sunless tanning lotion and proceed through the next week with lovely orange streaks?

3 - rob a bank and get a spray on tan which will last for a very few days and, according to my teen-age spray on tanning hostess, possibly leave me slightly orange???

4 - head into my public appearances with winter clothing to cover my glow-in-the-dark white skin?

It's tough because all the choices pretty much stink.

Then there's the shoes and mistreated toes. I think that it's a complete tragedy when I see summer toes encased in heavy winter shoes. The toes are suffocating in there already. Let them out!!!

So now we're back to the fact that it's finally spring weather here in the Flag family locale. That means we've had a handful of days with temps at 50 or above. That means that it hasn't snowed since Easter week-end. That means I need winter shoes in the morning, summer shoes in the mid-day, and winter shoes at night. What I need is transitional foot-wear.

So off to DSW I go. Now if you haven't been blessed with a DSW shoe store near you, I must apologize. It is a

warehouse (Designer Shoe Warehouse) of shoes that are beautiful and almost always in my size and the rows go on forever and ever! Okay, I'll stop.

Anyway, I go to DSW every spring and fall looking for transitional footwear. I need transitional shoes to wear while I drive my children to school and pick them up from school. I need transitional shoes to wear while I grocery shop for organic foods. I need transitional shoes to wear while I eat ice cream and grade my students' essays.

What I see is this:

And this:

Not a carpooling/buy some milk type of shoe -- at least for me.

And not a transitional shoe in there. *sigh*

Here are two other reasons I am conflicted about DSW:

1. Why do they have so many pairs of shoes missing one shoe (always the right). Is there a one-footed person out there shoplifting right shoes at my DSW?

2. What's with the ear piece communication devices the clerks wear? Inevitably, I will be talking to one and while I am asking where the right shoe is, she will begin to talking while looking at me. What she will say is something like this:

"How many bonus rewards do you have?"

I will respond,

"I think I have one coupon, but I left it home."

The clerk:

"I have 10."


"That's good?? Um, about the right shoe..."

The clerk:

"I need you to run a scan on...."

After I realize that she not offering to hire me, I do realize she is talking NOT TO ME, but to her little wire which is connected to her ear piece. The weird thing? She has not broken eye contact with me the entire time, nor did she apologize when compelled to start talking to someone else AFTER she asked if she could assist me.

Yes, DSW, I am very conflicted.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

The right shoes are often missing because security tags are only attached to the left shoes. Therefor shoplifters go for the right shoes. What they do with a bunch of right shoes i have no idea.