Who has time for spell check?

Many of us have benefited from  enjoyed  been embarrassed by the auto correct programs on our smart communication devices.  These programs were designed to save us from ourselves.  While sending a text or posting to a social networking site, and our smart phones/tablets will automatically substitute a word they "know" for a word we've typed that they don't recognize.  Sometimes it saves us; sometimes it hangs us out to dry.  My most recent auto spell gaffe was a simple text wherein I tried to convey that someone's maiden name was Booker.  If you've been a victim of auto correct, you know the message the phone actually sent, so I shouldn't even bother to type it.

But I will. This is the message my phone sent and that I did NOT catch until it was too late. "She used to be a hooker."

Laugh but you know you've been there, too. How do I know that?  I've seen your texts and posts on Facebook.  So we're even.

But I am pretty sure that my students don't compose their essays on their phones and most don't use tablets. So it was on an old fashioned PC or Mac that they composed these gems which they then submitted for a grade in my composition classes.  And grade them, I did.  I used to circle the mistakes and draw a smiley face, but then I realized that many of the authors didn't see the mistake even then.

So I will now save them for you.  Enjoy the summer session submissions! [I'll even translate them for you.]


"I was sad when I lost my part urinal grandfather. Then I lost several more part urinal uncles." [paternal]


"Me and my dad didn't always have a good relationship.  Now we have agreed to a cretin relationship." [certain]


"When my mom broke her arm, she had to have a big sergey on them. That was really painful." [surgery]


"We should stop blaming teachers when kids don't do good in school. I believe one of the biggest problems for kids is having elaterid parents." [illiterate]


And for an alarming statistic :

"Breastfeeding is illegal in 57 U.S. states." [Who knew?]

The new term begins on Monday, and I can't wait.