He Won't Mind, I'm Sure

The letter said that all "graduating" fifth graders needed a picture

to post on the board for all ceremony attendees to view.

Most of the other mothers with whom I spoke, sent in recent school pictures.

I sent in this one.

Boys Stink

When our first son was born, we proudly brought him to church and were greeted by a woman who bluntly said, "I must warn you: boys stink."

For the next several years, I pondered that pronouncement. Surely, she meant it in the most figurative of ways. Let's see: boys don't understand emotion, boys don't like girl drama, boys are messy, boys are rambunctious. Okay, I got the "boys stink" thing.

Then that first boy got a little older and more independent, and he was followed by another boy/brother and then a final boy/brother.

As each of the boys got old enough to dress himself and provide for his own hygiene, a phenomenon of sorts began to form.

It sounds like this on the way to school:

"Did you brush your teeth this morning?"

"No; is that something I'm supposed to do?"
~~~~~~
"I thought you took a shower last night."

"Uh huh."

"But something's not right. Did you wash EVERY part of your body?"

"No; is that something I'm supposed to do?"
~~~~~~

"I can't breathe. Whoa. Everyone, open your window before you pass out!!"

"Excuse me. It was just a little gas."

~~~~~~

"Why are your shoes melting?! Have you changed your socks this week?"

"No; is that something I'm supposed to do?"

~~~~~~

You know what? That lady from church was being literal.