Monday, March 9, 2009

Boys Stink

When our first son was born, we proudly brought him to church and were greeted by a woman who bluntly said, "I must warn you: boys stink."

For the next several years, I pondered that pronouncement. Surely, she meant it in the most figurative of ways. Let's see: boys don't understand emotion, boys don't like girl drama, boys are messy, boys are rambunctious. Okay, I got the "boys stink" thing.

Then that first boy got a little older and more independent, and he was followed by another boy/brother and then a final boy/brother.

As each of the boys got old enough to dress himself and provide for his own hygiene, a phenomenon of sorts began to form.

It sounds like this on the way to school:

"Did you brush your teeth this morning?"

"No; is that something I'm supposed to do?"
"I thought you took a shower last night."

"Uh huh."

"But something's not right. Did you wash EVERY part of your body?"

"No; is that something I'm supposed to do?"

"I can't breathe. Whoa. Everyone, open your window before you pass out!!"

"Excuse me. It was just a little gas."


"Why are your shoes melting?! Have you changed your socks this week?"

"No; is that something I'm supposed to do?"


You know what? That lady from church was being literal.


Laura ~Peach~ said...

When cory was in elementary school... 2nd or 3rd grade i think... he woudl go to the shower turn the water on and stand outside the shower...that boy child I guess thought he was losing something of himself by washing the dirt and stink off...I finally had to threaten to go in the bathroom with his stinky self... his hair OMG was sooo stinky and he decided on his own in kindergarden or 1st to wear it in a flat top so there was not much there... but YEP the lady was so right BOYS Stink! Good thing we moms know soaps and good smells LOL

joanne said... was always the hair thing here...I don't get it at all...but then i'm just aissy girl j)

Jeannelle said...

But, in about 5th grade, both gender of kids start to stink for awhile. The fifth grade room of my kids' school just reeked.....of B.O. from sweaty kids coming in from recess. The teacher would hand out deoderant samples off and on during the year...hint, hint.

Anonymous said...

LOL! Now I've got something to look forward to!

Noe Noe Girl...A Queen of all Trades. said...

Is my Little T at your house???

Treasia Stepp said...

Do I ever believe this one. My step son walked into the house yesterday after having played out for a while. I was in the doorway as he walked by and stopped him because of the smell. He swore he had had a bath. Needless to say he took another one before bedtime. LOL

Pancake said...

I have three boys, and yes BOYS stink!!

Anonymous said...

I made a pronouncement at my house a few years back, when The Boy became old enough to begin showering himself. I told him, if he did not, "Shower properly, brush the teeth, etc. etc." and he came down the stairs at ANY point in his life and I realized such (as long as he LIVES UNDER MY ROOF), I would simply send him back up to redo it until he had done it right. Now, we have not yet reached the point of big boy odor here. But we have had a few "back up the steps" on teeth brushing. My theory is simple, I have lived with his dad for eighteen years, and even at his sweatiest, grossest moments, I did not smell him. I have simply announced that the men in this house WILL NOT stink. And the men in this house KNOW, when MOM SAYS IT, MOM MEANS IT! Now, I understand if he is playing sports and he gets hot or something, and ends up yucky, but there is no sitting around on my furniture as such, and there is very little tolerance for odor at all here. Yes, my name is Pam and I have OCD to an extreme degree. And I am mentally scarring my child I am sure. And yet, he smells fresh and clean still. And if ever he doesn't, I will march him back up the stairs until he does :)
Thank you for this avenue to vent. I can always count on you. You are so much cheaper than therapy.

Anonymous said...

PS- Lego cake photos later today, tell your sweet smelling boys to pop over!

Unknown said...

I agree...boys stink. It is beyond my comprehension level too.

Betty said...

LOL! I had no idea! Now I´m glad I had girls... :)

Mental P Mama said...


Dr.John said...

My boys didn't stink but then I'm a dad. My wife was born without the ability to smell so she never complained.
No notes came from the school.