Do You See Pepper's Tongue?

'Tis sweet to hear the watch dogs' honest bark Bay deep-mouthed welcome as we draw near home; 'Tis sweet to know there is an eye will mark Our coming and look brighter when we come.'

Lord Byron

The Good Life

Her master says there are very clear parameters governing where Pepper may and may not be.

The other people who live in the house are a bit more indulgent.

Will I Be Strong Enough to Read Her Report Card?

Pepper's first behavior-training class is tonight. Now I wish I'd stocked up on those back-to-school supplies at Walmart last week.

The Plan Was...

At 2:00 I was congratulating myself on having dinner ready and waiting for the oven.

At 2:19 I was in the shower.

I needed to be at the middle school

at 2:47 to pick-up my daughter, otherwise

at 2:48 I would receive a text message asking, "Where ARE you?" and again

at 2:49, "Are you coming???"

I would bring my daughter home and be at the elementary school

at 3:17 to pick-up my non-asthmatic boys.

At 3:31 I would put dinner in the oven, and

at 4:00 I would be at work helping my students fall in love with grammar.

BUT,

at 2:35 an asthmatic boy called up the stairs,

"Wow, Mommy! The dog really likes what we're having for dinner!"

SO,

at 3:44 I was redistributing what was left of the casserole and adding a little more cheese.

At 4:30 the family ate dinner while I was work.

As of 8:50, each family member is, to the best of my knowledge, still alive.

It's Nice That She Cares, But ...

I am attempting to crawl out from under
17 tons
of laundry today,
so just one brief reflection from
the week-end.

For the record:

I do NOT appreciate the

way my dog feels she must groom me
when I exit the hot tub.

Foolishness

We can't believe we did it, but... we had our dog's DNA tested to determine just what she is.

It appears that she is:

Over 75% Labrador Retriever (you WERE right after all, Humane Society!)

10-19% Dalmatian:

And up to 10% Beagle:

I do believe that equals 100% Pepper:

Traitor

I don't have a jealous bone in my body.  No, not even a jealous cell.  Not I.

Then again, let's talk about Pepper the puppy and her love of my husband.

Every morning, Checkered makes his way downstairs to get ready for work.  I would like you to believe that I have preceeded him downstairs to make a nutritious breakfast for him, iron his clothing, et cetera.  Yes, you go right on and believe that.

Each morning, while the kids and I continue to slumber, Checkered lets Pepper out of her crate and strongly encourages her to go outside.  Then he shaves, and a grateful Pepper comes back inside.  She patiently waits for him to put his aftershave on, and then she rests her head against his knees.

Sweet, huh?

On Tuesday, I thought I might be jealous.  In order to prove that I wasn't, I let Pepper out of her crate after a long night.  I sent her outside, and put a little fragrance on.  Then I opened the door, and in my sweetest voice called, "Pepper!"

This dog - the one I lobbied to buy, the one I fought with Checkered to buy, the one I cared for and nursed back from the brink of death - this dog came into the house.  I slowly reached down to pet her, and this dog ducked away from my hand, ran around me and charged up the stairs to curl up on Checkered's pillow.

The fact that I told Checkered, "Of course that's NOT dog hair on your pillow," is the only solace I have.

Dreaming Her Life Away

Pepper the puppy is having a nightmare even as I type. She is comfortably resting on her luxurious bed which is full of static electricity. She is well-fed, well-loved, and well-kept. But still she is making pitiful, high-pitched crying noises and her feet are running back and forth while she dreams.

Pepper's life is pretty limited to a mile any direction from our house. On occasion, she encounters other dogs, but is almost always uninterested in them. She even let that one bully pee on her once. She and I both cried at that one. And she is bestfriendsworstenemies with the not necessarily bright neighbor dog.

So what is in that dream to make her run and cry?

I suppose Checkered might think Pepper is dreaming about being in the forbidden family room and running to get out before Checkered hollers at her. The kids probably think she is dreaming of how painstakingly slowly they get her food out each day. I like to think that she is dreaming about how badly life would have turned out for her had we not adopted her.

When she wakes up, she will no doubt want to tell me all the dream details before she forgets them.

I'll let you know what she says.

I've Been Reduced to Forwarding Emails in my Blog

The reason a dog has so many friends
is that he wags his tail instead of his tongue.
-Anonymous

There is no psychiatrist in the world
like a puppy licking your face.
-Ben Williams

A dog is the only thing on earth
that loves you more
than he loves himself.
-Josh Billings





The average dog is a nicer person
than the average person.
-Andy Rooney


Dogs love their friends and bite their enemies,
quite unlike people,
who are incapable of pure love and
always have to mix love &hate.
-Anonymous




Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like
never washed a dog.
-Franklin P. Jones

If your dog is fat,
you aren't getting enough exercise.
-Unknown





My dog is worried about the economy
because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can.
That's almost $21.00 in dog money.
-Joe Weinstein


Women and cats will do as they please.
Men and dogs should relax
and get used to the idea.
-Robert A. Heinlein


If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous
he will not bite you.
That is the principal difference
between a dog and a man.
-Mark Twain

Dogs are not our whole life,
but they make our lives whole.
-Roger Caras


If you think dogs can't count,
try putting three dog biscuits in your pocket
and then give him only two of them.
-Phil Pastoret

The Trauma of a Walk

You've met Pepper the Puppy.  She is smart and sweet and very fond of ear lobes.  She is also very fond of her bed.  Stretched out, upside down is her favorite way to spend the day.

But one of the reasons I bought Pepper is because I have a little excess luggage around the middle, the chest, the thighs, and the under arms which needs to find a new home.  That luggage is going nowhere fast, so I need to do something. 

I could diet.  NOT.   I could just stop complaining about it.  NOT.  I could exercise! I could use that big balance ball I bought last year.  NOT.  I could use the Ablounger I bought this summer.  NOT.  I could use the Gazelle I bought two years ago.  NOT.  I finally figured it out.  I could just walk, and for that I would need a dog.

Now that puzzled Checkered immensely.  He is just silly like that!

So now I have Pepper and we know that dogs love their walks.  Here is a picture of Pepper.

No, she is not in our yard.  Yes, we are taking a walk.  No, she is NOT WALKING.

We have adopted the only dog who despises moving.  Researcher that I am, I spent some time with the topic. Here is what I learned:

• 
  
  Offer the recalcitrant dog a treat.
• 
  
  Never offer the recalcitrant dog a treat.
• 
  
  Tug on her lead.
• 
  
  Never tug on her lead.

SO then, after putting that cutting edge research into action, I dragged Pepper around the block.....

....where another dog ceremoniously peed on her.

She and I managed to get home.  She and I survived her immediate bath.

She is now recovering in the sock basket.

And I am recovering in the ice cream container.

Does She Look a Little Hung-Over to You?

I kid you not.  Yesterday, while all my children were at school,  our puppy returned to the house dressed like this after a jaunt in the backyard.  She was not so adorned when she went outside.  I've always wondered what she did out there.  I guess that is one mystery now solved.

Alpha Dog

When Pepper joined our family last week, we worried about her self-concept and esteem. After all, she was told by the Big City Humane Society that she was a large dog. (Does 10 pounds at 3 months count as large?) And she was told that she is a black Lab. We are still looking for that Lab drop of blood in her.


So we wondered what would happen when she came home and met the crazy puppy from next door. Would that same crazy puppy tease our little mis-labeled dog? Would that neighbor who specializes in digging under the fence and barking incessantly and biting her owner be cruel to our mystery pedigree Pepper?


Well, here's how it works:


The neighbor dog runs outside several times a day and waits patiently for Pepper to be forced outside. Then the neighbor dog playfully calls to Pepper,

"Please, Pep, will you run the fence with me? Please, please, Pepper, I'll let you snack on my untrimmed long grass if you will just sit with me at lunch acknowledge that I'm alive."

And the neighbor dog prances and jumps and puts her paw through the fence so Pepper can chew on it.


And once in a great while, Pepper deigns to be nice to the neighbor dog and sends her a text message. Sometimes, she actually says,"Hi," to the neighbor dog when they pass in the halls at school. And one time Pepper even smiled at the neighbor dog even though there was a cute guy nearby. And the neighbor dog is so happy and grateful because for a few seconds a day, she gets to be Pepper's BFF.


Pepper's self-esteem is coming along nicely, thank-you.